New flame, Old Sea

Yo so I think I've met this really sweet guy. Relax, I'm not getting my hopes up or anything because I barely know him and I don't know if he already has someone else. I barely meet him so I doubt anything can come out of this, not with AS coming around the corner and all that. I mean he probably thinks I'm some sort of whiner and all that but yea I want to know him more. I want to really know him before falling for him. I don't want fall for my perfected image of him. Hey maybe this will work, maybe it won't but I think I understand now. It's better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. I don't know. I've gotten my heart broken before but I dunno... I guess I appreciate the experience. I think I'd rather have gone through that humiliation than to have never felt anything.

Which brings me to my second problem... I realized that I compare him a lot to that guy I used to like. Not as in who's better looking or anything but rather all their similarities. I mean, maybe this is my staple kind of guy. This is the personality I dig but I'm afraid I'm just looking at him as a replacement to my old crush. I mean they are so different in personality but I keep saying Omg he's just like him. I mean even his friend reminds me of his friend. (ok from here on out, you-know-who will be yellow to stop this confusion on him) So what now? I'm over him....I'm pretty sure I am but I don't want a replacement I want a genuine person who may or may not like me.

Sigh...NO! I will not revert to my emo ramblings. I'm a confident girl; one day there will be someone for me even if it is not this guy. I'm tired of feeling down all the time. I made my move didn't I? I have never made friends so easily before have I? So what's the problem? Can't I be this confident chick that guys dig (I must stop using that word, I hate it). I want to be me, well a confident me. I'm not going to be overlooked because I can't or am too shy to communicate with someone else.

This is it. I'm going to make my move. It's too early to say anything but all I know is I want to change. I want to be that confident person I saw in front of that debate stage. I want to be the person who met so many people in the span of 2 days. That's the girl I wanna be, who I should be. I'm not hiding anymore. I want to shine.