Silly Choices

I have no idea whose bright idea was it to have a trip after the exams but I hate you (not really). Something I have noticed from SPM and even before is that exams pull people apart. Yea it's a sad situation for mid-year but I realize it was great for me for SPM because by the last day of exams, I wasn't as sad as I was during grad (which was way before the exams). I was used to not spending every day with the same people that I didn't even really feel the need to say goodbye. I think it somehow saddens me in a way cause it was these people that I never really bothered getting in touch with but at least it didn't hurt.

I guess I could say the same happened during A-Levels exams. I don't think I really had a longer than 2 minute conversation with anyone outside Tea Party. Then the trip came and everything was screwed up. Because we were close pre-exam, it was so comfortable to talk to some of them. I think I bonded to a few people that I only had awkward conversations with before (one of them thanks to the love of just soaking in the water). What's the point though? What's the point of forming new bonds that would only last a period of a few days?

Maybe I'm just being pessimistic, I would say realistic (or as Romeo calls it 'down to earth') but I have not much hope in seeing anyone again. I mean yes, even if we do keep to our once a year plan, it wouldn't be the same. No one would be that close anymore. Maybe the gangs would be with each other in some ways but that's it. Is it weird that i'm missing people outside my gang more than in? Maybe I optimistically believe that it would take a long time for Tea Party to break up (though recently I've had my doubts) and so I'm not so worried about that yet. To quote Shu Why, you can call any Tea Party member and say 'I miss you, let's hang out' but can't really say that to anyone outside without sounding odd. So yea... maybe I'm being both optimistic and pessimistic at the same time.

So yea, I'm just really out of it. I'm not going to say I'm gonna bawl like a baby 2moro cause it's hard to make me cry. Tear up, easy, but cry, no. Doesn't mean I won't miss everyone though. Lolz, if you are not the hugging type and I ask for a hug just let me know kay? I like hugs and am kinda a touchy feely person so yea. Just let me know if you uncomfortable, I won't mind. Cya