Letters to Ponder

Well day 2 is here and I'm procastinating the next letter. How I'm gonna last 30 days is anyones guess. Next topic: Letter to my crush. Problem is I don't really have a current real crush. Not really at least. There are some guys I have to hots for but nothing serious if you get my drift. Should I write to them? Should I write a general letter? Or should I write to a celebrity I've fallen head over heels for? If so, then who? First person in mind is Adam Lambert but what do I write? If I ever wrote a letter to him it'd probably full of fangirlish stuff and I don't want to write that on my blog here. So who and what should I write? Boy these letters are really bugging me man. I've spent the whole day of college today just thinking about who I should write to and it just goes round and round and round and I can't stop and pick anyone. Who Who Who?

Day 1 — My Best Friend

I've heard it said
That people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led
To those who help us most to grow
If we let them
And we help them in return
Well, I don't know if I believe that's true
But I know I'm who I am today
Because I knew you...

Dear Aisyah,
Well I have no idea what to write without being overly corny sappy or just plain cheesy. I hope you are not hoping for some heartfelt declaration of love or some shit like that. Hahaha! You know me, that's not the kind of crap I write.

Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you
I have been changed for good

So wow 11 years. It feels way way longer than that. I wonder how much of those early primary school life do you remember? I still cringe at all those horrid memories. In all honesty until this day I wonder when did we ever pass that line from being friend/acquaintances/mortal enemies(XD) to best friends? I mean that doesn't count all those childish times when we declared everyone mary, kate ashley and their sister was our best friends. I honestly can't remember the turning point but I can't seem to say I regret it.

It well may be
That we will never meet again
In this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me
Is made of what I learned from you
You'll be with me
Like a handprint on my heart
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have re-written mine
By being my friend...

No one believes me y'know when i tell everyone you corrupted me. That you introduced me to the wonderful world of slash. If only they knew the truth. Hmph! Damn you and your innocent facade. It's not just slash though, you got me into writing poetry (yea they're bad but good enough y'know?). Haven't written one in forever but you got me started on it. Can't say I regret it though. It was something else we could bond over instead of fighting whether Hakkai or Sanzo was a better hero. X l

Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a skybird
In a distant wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you
I have been changed for good

Do you know it's your fault that I ended up in Bukit Jalil school? Yea you probably do, me being clingy and overbearing and all that. Can't say i regret that decision though. Sure I might have had better results in a control school but I have met so many wonderful people on the way. Who knew that still the last 5 years together in that school we could still stand to learn more about each other? Sure there were tense times but then there were also the best of times and there were the Phantom of the Opera times. Boy was that one weird and hectic time. Not just putting on the show but the aftermath as well. (And i managed to drag you into a dress XD) It was as it should be I guess.

And just to clear the air
I ask forgiveness
For the things I've done you blame me for
But then, I guess we know
There's blame to share
And none of it seems to matter anymore

I guess that is all I can say. There are like a million things more I could put and yet nothing to write. I guess all I could say is I miss not seeing you every other day. I miss rolling my eyes and telling the teacher that Aisyah isn't here again. I miss laughing about the most random stuff that no one else seem to understand. I guess the bottom line is I miss you and I can't wait to see you soon.

Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood
Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a bird in the wood

Your friend,

Charmaine Chua

Who can say if I've been
Changed for the better?
I do believe I have been
Changed for the better
And because I knew you...
Because I knew you...
Because I knew you...
have been changed for good...

PS. It seems like I'll have to leave the cliche bit here I guess. Thank you for everything.

Letters to No One

On this day you write a letter to:
Day 1 — Your Best Friend
Day 2 — Your Crush
Day 3 — Your parents
Day 4 —Your sibling (or closest relative)
Day 5 — Your dreams
Day 6 — A stranger
Day 7 — Your Ex-boyfriend/girlfriend/love/crush
Day 8 — Your favorite internet friend
Day 9 — Someone you wish you could meet
Day 10 — Someone you don’t talk to as much as you’d like to
Day 11 — A Deceased person you wish you could talk to
Day 12 — The person you hate most/caused you a lot of pain
Day 13 — Someone you wish could forgive you
Day 14 — Someone you’ve drifted away from
Day 15 — The person you miss the most
Day 16 — Someone that’s not in your state/country
Day 17 — Someone from your childhood
Day 18 — The person that you wish you could be
Day 19 — Someone that pesters your mind—good or bad
Day 20 — The one that broke your heart the hardest
Day 21 — Someone you judged by their first impression
Day 22 — Someone you want to give a second chance to
Day 23 — The last person you kissed
Day 24 — The person that gave you your favorite memory
Day 25 — The person you know that is going through the worst of times
Day 26 — The last person you made a pinky promise to
Day 27 — The friendliest person you knew for only one day
Day 28 — Someone that changed your life
Day 29 — The person that you want tell everything to, but too afraid to
Day 30 — Your reflection in the mirror

Hahaha well well well. This looks like a lot of work. I mean seriously. 30 days of posts non-stop. Daunting but maybe it will let me keep my blog alive. Some of these letters seem to lean into being extra personal and stuff. I mean my blog's about opening up right? So I guess it won't kill me to try it I guess. I'd probably give up way before Day 5 but I'll try my best.

Which Supernatural Angel Are You?

Hahahaha Hey guys. I'm back...kinda. Hahaha it's 3 am in the morning and I'm bored so I decided to go on about Supernatural. (Just finished Season 5 and am currently suffering from withdrawal XD) Ok so usual spoiler-warning and believe me, my post will be nothing but spoilers.

Hahaha so anyway check out the above personality quiz result. Haha so anyone surprised I'm happy. Well shame on you cause you don't know me well enough. XD Well Lucifer is everything I wanted him to be. An angel (of course all the angels are pretty much douche-bags so it doesn't really make him less evil does it?), charming, doesn't lie and is honestly anti-human instead of anti-god. He could have chosen a much handsomer vessel (no Sam Winchester is not) instead of some 40 something yea old man. Don't get me wrong, the actor played Lucifer brilliantly but I wanted a really handsome Lucifer. Sigh. Haha.

Well well well who would have guessed out of all the angels (excluding Castiel) my favorite one would be Gabriel. Haha it really surprised me; I mean tell me this like 3 months ago and I'd tell you you were insane. I mean the Trickster was hilarious and all (his appearance had some of the best eps) but wonderful or squeelable not really. And of all the archangels Gabriel has always been the blah one for me maybe because he featured the most in the Gospels and so it's like meh boring whatever. Seriously though Gabriel was just awesome. I mean as soon as he cut the whole 'I don't give a shit' persona and let himself out (talking about the apocalypse and such) I just knew I was going to love this guy. Maybe because I'm the eldest child (you'd think I'd actually like Michael (more)) just the way he acted the whole little brother way and the whole 'I don't want to see my family fight' kind of thing makes me feel so protective of him like I don't want him to get hurt. Haha a 18 year old girl wants to protect a centuries old archangel. Hahaha but seriously he is just so vulnerable under that mask of his. In some ways actually, he reminds me more of Dean than Michael does. I can't help but hope that God would bring him back to life. I'd miss him too much to leave him be. Sigh Maybe a bigger role? Haha now I'm just reaching.

Haha ok so I said excluding Cas. Why? Because Cas is the best thing that has ever happened to Supernatural and I have fallen head over heals for him. This guy takes deadpanned snarker to a whole new level since well for a start he isn't snarking; he's being extremely serious. Haha Repeatedly I've tried to shove my head into the television and give him a big hug (maybe like how cupid did XD poor Cas) When I laid eyes on him for the first time I knew I'd love him. I mean his entrance itself was just badass with a capital B. I must have really found something I liked in this fellow cause when Lucifer 'killed' him, I was literally screaming in my room. He gets better but that's not the point. That really hurt. Hahahaha great now I'm overreacting. Haha I ship Dean/Castiel but for some reason I don't enjoy reading fanfics about them. I dunno maybe friends first lovers later? Hahaha Cas Cas Cas

Ok season 6 theories. ok fine they are not my ideas but hey brainstorming's good right? Ok first thing Chuck is God. I mean there seemed no other reason to make him disappear all of the sudden without explanation unless they just wanted some cliffhanger or something. Good idea but I hope not. I kinda like Chuck as a person so I don't want him to be you know, God only pretending to be like that kinda thing. I mean I'd rather see it as he disappeared because he went to heaven (like Elijah did) because he accepted he was a prophet and had finished his job. He might be the new link for the boys and heaven, taking over Cas' job. I'm so worried that they'd push Cas aside the next season but the audience love him so much so hopefully not. I can't believe I didn't come out with this theory by myself. Cas said he was better than new and he is obviously so much stronger than before. He's been promoted to archangel. It makes sense; I mean Gabriel's dead (NO!!!!) and Michael and Lucifer's in hell/trapped so it makes sense God needed to replace them. If this is true there's a big chance that Raphael would be come the Bad in Season 6 though maybe not the big bad. It's better than the Crowley idea. I'd rather Crowley stick with good...well as good as a demon can be I guess. Last theory (for now), Joshua is Jesus. Haha a bit far-fetched but I really salute the guy who thought of it. Joshua=Yeshua=Jesus. Of course there are so many Joshua's in the bible but I can actually see the director's of supernatural pull something like this off. Honestly though I'd rather they didn't touch Jesus. I mean going off about God is one thing but Jesus is a bit too far. Too religeous even for a show like Supernatural and too pro-Christianity (or anti could work either way). I'd rather they didn't show God either y'know. Keep him mysterious. I dunno works better for me. Haha Michael and Lucifer should come back. I think either Michael would turn to the dark side or Lucifer would turn good (the first one is more likely though). I mean what else can we expect? They are stuck with each other for dunno how long. They'd probably bond pretty well.

Haha erm that's it I guess. Discussed all that I could. Haha I'm just posting this for the sake of updating my blog. Haha except for a few loyal readers I doubt anyone else is reading this thing. Haha probably would die soon. Haha k then. Bye guys.

PS: I got my writing mojo back. Hallelujah.