I've given up on being happy here. Maybe it's just exam stress but I honestly hate my life now. Half of me wants to fail so I dun have to continue here anymore. The other half knows I can't take that kind of blow. I'm angry all the time and if I'm not angry I'm stressed beyond my mind. Honestly I can't look forward to next year. I dunno wat I want anymore. Sometimes I just want to lie down and die. Makes everything so much more simpler. I am not coping well as you can tell. I just have the feeling I'm not gonna do well for this exam and I dunno what to do anymore. I just want my results now so I can decide what to do with my life. I'm just not happy here. I hate everything. All that's keeping me sane are the shows I watch every week and even those are not enough anymore. Nothing is enough anymore. All I feel is dread for the coming year, for the coming years, even for working. I dunno if it's just the stress talking but I'm not looking forward to being a doctor at all. I just want to give up...not just on this...on everything...